For Christina

I never knew I wanted you
till you were here.
Now life without you seems incomplete.
From the moment I knew you were coming I had a sense of pride
Now you are gone.
My heart breaks missing you
more each day.
I long for you to be in my arms
but God
has you in His.
He may have chosen you
to be His angel
But remember my child
I will hold you in my heart forever.

Dedicated to my sweet Christina Lynn
Mommy loves you

For Ethan William, who was born and died on Janury 27,2003 at 9:43 pm
He was diagnosed with Trisomy 18, and a major heart condition

Jesus, there's a baby at your gate
so tiny and small
'neath the wings of an angel you sent to his call.

Please tell him of us,
his family on earth.
How we love him and miss him,
our hearts full of hurt.

Play in your sunshine
of heaven above,
Fill his life with happiness,
health and Your love.

Play football and tag,
all the things young boys do,
With angels and loved ones,
but mostly with you.

And on summer days
take him down to the sea,
Where he can swim with dolphins,
And ride waves on the sea.

When his birthday rolls 'round
Put a kiss on his cake,
(Be sure that it's chocolate,
that's the kind that I'd make).

Can I ask one more thing, Lord?
Each night as I lay down my head,
Will you hug him and kiss
his sweet tiny head?

Tell him we love him
And wanted him so,
We know that he loves us,
And why he had to go.

Written for Ethan by Nanny Carlson, dedicated from Mommy and Daddy.
Written January 28, 2003-We love you angel boy XXOO


A teardrop may be the first line of a poem.
If shed it can begin to cleanse the soul.
Not shed, it remains
To be added to the pool of pain
And unspoken sorrow
Which will bid the heart to break.
Without words, it adds to grief and despair.
When you hold me and I speak with you
Then I know you really care.

Jack M. Stack, M.D.
September 2001

Anna of Allenhurst

Anna danced in the wind.
Spinning and twirling with yellow rose petals.
Then fluttered in to the Atlantic.
Dark and choppy; churning white around the rocks.
Gone in an instant that seemed to linger forever.
But still in our hearts.
Now she is at the beach.
On the rocks, in the sea.
Sliding down the dunes,
running on the boardwalk.
Eating an ice cream cone that melts too fast in the summer sun.
Building sand castles that get washed away.
Holding our hands and walking out into the waves.
Floating away, but never really gone.
Because she was never really here.

Written by Anna's Dad

To Our Son

A boy they said, to complete our family
But unfortunately, it just wasn't meant to be

All of our hopes and all of our dreams
Were taken from us, how unfair this seems

You had a serious defect
We couldn't believe it was true
How could this happen to us
Now what are we to do

We cried a lot, we were scared
But how lucky we were to have friends and family who cared

We had so many dreams for our little boy,
We only expected that we would feel joy

We will get through it, I can't imagine how
All I know is I want you here with me right now

We miss you and love you - we think of you often
You are in our hearts forever and will never be forgotten

I long to hold you each and every minute
I just cannot imagine my life without you in it

We had you for such a short while My baby, My son
We are your parents and our job is not done

Your memory lives with us in our hearts
As long as this is so, we will never be apart.

We will meet again, I know this is true
But until then, please know we love and miss you.

For now we will cherish all our memories
Thank you for the privilege to be your Mommy and Daddy

In our lives for but a minute, in our hearts forever.

By Tara for Riley John, December 12, 2002


Books on Loss and Grief

Our Heartbreaking Choices: Forty-Six Women Share Their Stories of Interrupting a Much-Wanted Pregnancy

The Dive :: A Memoir

A Time to Decide a Time to Heal: For Parents Making Difficult Decisions About Babies They Love

Precious Lives Painful Choices: A Prenatal Decision-Making Guide

Sunshine After the Storm: A Survival Guide for the Grieving Mother

Empty Cradle, Broken Heart, Revised Edition: Surviving the Death of Your Baby

Empty Arms: Coping With Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Infant Death

A Silent Sorrow: Pregnancy Loss

Unspeakable Losses: Healing From Miscarriage, Abortion, And Other Pregnancy Loss

Surviving Pregnancy Loss: A Complete Sourcebook for Women and Their Families

Difficult Decisions: For Families Whose Unborn Baby Has a Serious Problem

Books for Fathers, Family, Children and Friends

Couple Communication After a Baby Dies: Differing Perspectives

For Better or Worse: For Couples Whose Child Has Died

How to Say it When You Don't Know What to Say: The Right Words For Difficult Times

A Guide For Fathers: When A Baby Dies

When Your Friend's Child Dies: A Guide to Being a Thoughtful and Caring Friend

When Pregnancy Fails: Families Coping with Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Death

What You Can Say When You Don't Know What to Say: Reaching Out to Those Who Hurt

Books about Trying Again and Pregnancy after Loss

Journeys: Stories of Pregnancy After Loss

Trying Again: A Guide to Pregnancy After Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss

Pregnancy After a Loss: A Guide to Pregnancy After a Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Infant Death